When i go to bed and wake up tomorrow morning, will it be over? Back then i can be an ignorant teenager and be oblivious with what exactly happened, but now as a twenty year old young lady can i still do that? My worst nightmare come true just as i was about to start having fun through adult life and university life, just as i was enjoying my holiday after my first semester. Time is always a factor for me. I will worry whether do I need to grow up soon or let it be? Do I think ahead of myself? Questions that every human being will ask when they face difficulties, 'Why? Why me? Why now? Why not later? How? What to do?'
I now understand clearly when a friend once told me she thought of hurting herself just to test whether can she still feel, sense pain with all the misery she went through. How she would want to escape from it. I actually thought of it just now. How will it be to just put a cut at that exact spot where you can see the veins? Does it hurt when im not feeling anything right now? How will it be if I was gone? Will it be less misery for them? Less problem, less burden? The urge was so strong that i had to slap myself. I can imagine the Angel and Devil on my shoulders. Do it! Don't do it! IS my belief strong enough? Is it true that i will be punish for doing it? Will i enter Hell?..........How childish of me, how naive to think that the problem will solve if i was gone. Looks like the Angel won the battle.
It's been a problem ever since i was born, even before i was born but i manage to evade it and God loves me enough to delay it till now. Looks like God thinks I am strong,old and mature enough to handle it. Should I be thankful? Should I be happy then?
When i was young i always asked, 'Can i have that? Can i have this?' I want so many things but the answers i get will always be the same, 'Nope, not now. Sorry, later when i can get it for you 'k dear, Work hard and get it yourself when you grow up, Aim for it' ...Yeah that's what i did. Aim for it! Till now i manage to reduce my aims and dreams to just a few. i finally got what i wanted but it is always later than anybody else but i do not begrudge it. I love them. They try to give me what i want eventhough it takes time and many years later. I take it positively,convince myself this is what you have to go through because your situation is different than your friends. This have made me appreciate every single little thing that i've own. I grew up being a pampered girl, daddy's girl. Compare to some people I am one fortunate girl. Ofcourse even that's the case, I know exavtly what the real picture looks like. That is why i am working so hard to get a degree, working so hard to make sure i must succeed, wishing so hard for things that i want it to be and to happen. I wonder if i wish hard enough it will come true? Dad always tells me that i am a lucky girl for whatever i wish for will come true. That was when i was young. I really did believe and thought I am a lucky girl but as time goes by i did realised that im lucky because my dad made the wish came true. He tried his best to make the wishes come true so how am i to blame him for what had just happened? How could i?.. with the love he showers me with? I just can't..
I can't really see what im typing...I'll continue later
Saturday, December 30, 2006
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
lazy gal...
i wonder do i have to do this all the time...once a month an entry to my blog..damn lazy huh??
What happened...? I cut my hair till above shoulder length!! Feels different..younger, free-er, and sexier ...i just felt like that..first time in love with a hairstyle...hmmm a new hairstyle to welcome the new year i guess..cut off the old and spoilt hair made me feel like im to have a new beginning..start something or do things differently...uurrgghh i don't feel like blogging or should i say crapping but i feel like typing or just have a new entry for my blog..maybe i just crap whatever came into my mind..
im on holiday again...there goes my RM7000 per semester...dang that was fast..i can't believe i finish one semester already..things just happened and classes all 14weeks...totally different compare to the time i waited/wasted..time pass so slow at that moment..now it seems to be flying..make new friends..meet new people..gossiping..enjoying movies together..ponteng-ing classes..studying..exam..ahahaha looks like my 3 years is not going to be long...will have to enjoy till the end!! *hopefully* it's just the first semester maybe i feel that it was easy..more tough roads/paths to take..
friends been flying and making trips here and there..cousins, relatives been flying, calling and making trips in and out of countries..i want to do that also..spending ONLY 3weeks in London is soooooooo not enough..heck it make me want MORE!!! i almost got to go again with my brother but he decided to go later maybe during February..ahhhh couldnt make it ..semester2 starting...but i wouldn't want to also.. i wanna spend a very long time there not just a few months vacation...ahh im a dreamer...i have big-huge-and-far-away-hard-to-reach dreams!! =p
baby gal yieng yieng is back from kangaroo land...but the number of times i see her can be counted with one hand..*sigh* holiday is time to meet up old friends and spent some time mamak-ing...saw some old friends and i realised i missed them so much..eventhough we were not tightly close but i still miss them..really enjoy chatting with them...another friend is flying off again oversea to study..Germany..jealous gila!! ahahah..but he's nervous..a foreign land german speaking people..hmm but for me i think it wil be fun...at least he's at Europe..experiencing the 4seasons and meeting foreigners who might or most probably be arrogant, scary, or maybe friendly and helpful...that will be very good experience..maybe getting lost at places and find the way out..ahhh going through all those while having to excel in his studies...all alone without any burden but only thinking of what will be best for himself..the liberty is the best thing i supposed..nobody to answer to or feel responsible to or whatever..i guess...of course homesick will be bad..but then..ahaha im about to start crapping and i don't even know what's my point is!! =p
hmmm..let's see..any news bout my love life? erm wait..do i have a love life...erm...nope i don't!! hahaha..well a non-existence marriage with a korean and american dude..does it count? =p well this 2 guys are now my current crushes..i call them my hubbies and Amelia called them my pathetic-school-girl-crushes..pathetic,no?..but i like it..calling these 2 hubbies..better then doing nothing at all..mom was wondering why me no bf..me was thinking why no feeling towards anyone or anyone having any feelings for me..erm well not that i know of...my problem or what? well of course not my problem..it's just the people i meet are all good to be friends but not bf..my standard too high?..too fussy? ahahha...things that i rather enjoy talking with my gal friends together...i especially like how PY was when we were at Midvalley foodcourt *wink wink* =p
had an early Xmas...went out for dinner..exchanging presents..ahhh..really in the xmas mood here..love the presents i have this year..well i actually love my presents every year so hehehe..really happy that we still have our annual Xmas celebration..been doing that for quite some years..and this year baby gal yieng yieng is still here with us..so nothing much different also...i just wanna say i love my pressies a lot!!! thank you gals!! and kenny!! =)
well enough crapping now..more to come later! ciao bloggie..
What happened...? I cut my hair till above shoulder length!! Feels different..younger, free-er, and sexier ...i just felt like that..first time in love with a hairstyle...hmmm a new hairstyle to welcome the new year i guess..cut off the old and spoilt hair made me feel like im to have a new beginning..start something or do things differently...uurrgghh i don't feel like blogging or should i say crapping but i feel like typing or just have a new entry for my blog..maybe i just crap whatever came into my mind..
im on holiday again...there goes my RM7000 per semester...dang that was fast..i can't believe i finish one semester already..things just happened and classes all 14weeks...totally different compare to the time i waited/wasted..time pass so slow at that moment..now it seems to be flying..make new friends..meet new people..gossiping..enjoying movies together..ponteng-ing classes..studying..exam..ahahaha looks like my 3 years is not going to be long...will have to enjoy till the end!! *hopefully* it's just the first semester maybe i feel that it was easy..more tough roads/paths to take..
friends been flying and making trips here and there..cousins, relatives been flying, calling and making trips in and out of countries..i want to do that also..spending ONLY 3weeks in London is soooooooo not enough..heck it make me want MORE!!! i almost got to go again with my brother but he decided to go later maybe during February..ahhhh couldnt make it ..semester2 starting...but i wouldn't want to also.. i wanna spend a very long time there not just a few months vacation...ahh im a dreamer...i have big-huge-and-far-away-hard-to-reach dreams!! =p
baby gal yieng yieng is back from kangaroo land...but the number of times i see her can be counted with one hand..*sigh* holiday is time to meet up old friends and spent some time mamak-ing...saw some old friends and i realised i missed them so much..eventhough we were not tightly close but i still miss them..really enjoy chatting with them...another friend is flying off again oversea to study..Germany..jealous gila!! ahahah..but he's nervous..a foreign land german speaking people..hmm but for me i think it wil be fun...at least he's at Europe..experiencing the 4seasons and meeting foreigners who might or most probably be arrogant, scary, or maybe friendly and helpful...that will be very good experience..maybe getting lost at places and find the way out..ahhh going through all those while having to excel in his studies...all alone without any burden but only thinking of what will be best for himself..the liberty is the best thing i supposed..nobody to answer to or feel responsible to or whatever..i guess...of course homesick will be bad..but then..ahaha im about to start crapping and i don't even know what's my point is!! =p
hmmm..let's see..any news bout my love life? erm wait..do i have a love life...erm...nope i don't!! hahaha..well a non-existence marriage with a korean and american dude..does it count? =p well this 2 guys are now my current crushes..i call them my hubbies and Amelia called them my pathetic-school-girl-crushes..pathetic,no?..but i like it..calling these 2 hubbies..better then doing nothing at all..mom was wondering why me no bf..me was thinking why no feeling towards anyone or anyone having any feelings for me..erm well not that i know of...my problem or what? well of course not my problem..it's just the people i meet are all good to be friends but not bf..my standard too high?..too fussy? ahahha...things that i rather enjoy talking with my gal friends together...i especially like how PY was when we were at Midvalley foodcourt *wink wink* =p
had an early Xmas...went out for dinner..exchanging presents..ahhh..really in the xmas mood here..love the presents i have this year..well i actually love my presents every year so hehehe..really happy that we still have our annual Xmas celebration..been doing that for quite some years..and this year baby gal yieng yieng is still here with us..so nothing much different also...i just wanna say i love my pressies a lot!!! thank you gals!! and kenny!! =)
well enough crapping now..more to come later! ciao bloggie..
Wednesday, November 1, 2006
pasar malam..
I wonder how long ago since the last time i went to pasar malam...i think was the time i went with baby gal Yieng Yieng...this time i actually went to this pasar malam at Taman Connaught(hopefully correct spelling)...hehe friend drove us all there...yes Taman Connaught at Cheras where UCSI is situated where i would normally NOT go because it's so far away from my place...imagine a pasar malam nearby my house also i damn lazy to go..but i heard that this pasar malam is good..so i must go and have an eye opener...which i don't regret.. it was great..soooooooo many food!!! They even sell the ice-cream that i ate when i was small..hahahah can't resist i must get it...really remind me of my childhood back at Sunway! x) it was soooooo long the pasar malam...soooo sooooo long!! muahahahah...but according to my friend because it was raining so it wasn't long enough and i was like ...whoa!not long enough...? heheh anyway really enjoy the night..
finally finish my assignment for econs...hehehe 2 weeks in advance! hahaha Chenn here didn't do last minute work!! miracle!! hahaha.......but then still have other assignments still...aih..can never run!! DUWAN talk about assignment now..
MICHAEL SCHUMACHER~~!!! The legend of F1... retire this year and i sooooooooo regret i didnt go and watch him at the last Malaysia GP...yes i know he didn't win but at least i can see him in the Ferrari for the last time!!! aaahhhhhh~~!!! I don't like it at all..pooor thing but things happened...what to do...if Michael can accept it so cooly and openly of course i must be as sporting as him....he really did a great job in Brazil.. with a tyre puncture tailing at the back and almost being overlap by Massa..different 71seconds with Massa....he still managed to climb his way back up to 4th place...everyone believes if without the tyre puncture he could have win the GP..or if there are more laps to go he can catch up with Alonso..and win the constructor championship...aahhhh~~!! the Ferrari was in such a great condition that you think it was flying!!! Both of the Ferrari!! totally beautiful....Kimi Raikkonen....heheh he'll be wearing red next year.. i wonder how he looks like and hopefully he will do well in the Ferrari..hopefully he can win the driver's championship next year....really Hopeful now!!!!
well that's all for now...i damn sleepy....aarggghh go to sleep after eating so much junkie!! heheh but i don't care much now...damn tired!! nite nite all! =)
finally finish my assignment for econs...hehehe 2 weeks in advance! hahaha Chenn here didn't do last minute work!! miracle!! hahaha.......but then still have other assignments still...aih..can never run!! DUWAN talk about assignment now..
MICHAEL SCHUMACHER~~!!! The legend of F1... retire this year and i sooooooooo regret i didnt go and watch him at the last Malaysia GP...yes i know he didn't win but at least i can see him in the Ferrari for the last time!!! aaahhhhhh~~!!! I don't like it at all..pooor thing but things happened...what to do...if Michael can accept it so cooly and openly of course i must be as sporting as him....he really did a great job in Brazil.. with a tyre puncture tailing at the back and almost being overlap by Massa..different 71seconds with Massa....he still managed to climb his way back up to 4th place...everyone believes if without the tyre puncture he could have win the GP..or if there are more laps to go he can catch up with Alonso..and win the constructor championship...aahhhh~~!! the Ferrari was in such a great condition that you think it was flying!!! Both of the Ferrari!! totally beautiful....Kimi Raikkonen....heheh he'll be wearing red next year.. i wonder how he looks like and hopefully he will do well in the Ferrari..hopefully he can win the driver's championship next year....really Hopeful now!!!!
well that's all for now...i damn sleepy....aarggghh go to sleep after eating so much junkie!! heheh but i don't care much now...damn tired!! nite nite all! =)
Sunday, October 8, 2006
angry ahhhh!!!!!
I lost my entry again...just because of 1 click!! *sigh*
Here goes..Haze haze go away..i hate it so much..it is not a natural phenomenon..we are not supposed to experience it every year unless the land at Indonesia self-combust every year and all then i can't complain much..but this time again it was caused by IDIOTS..NO-BRAINER..HOMO SAPIEN..do they realized how many countries is affected by it? Use the brain la please..Almost every moning i saw ambulance rushing here and there..pity those people with asthma and breathing difficulties..God bless them..poor thing..Stupid haze make me sorethroat..my eyes itchy..and i can't see the KL Tower and KLCC and the moon clearly!! Even driving to and fro uni is so depressing (quote amelia) i am driving tomorrow..hopefully the haze will be gone just like yesterday.
it's been 5 weeks since i last blog..too many things to think of and do..busy busy busy..ahahah now new assignment..4000words!!! Econs..ahahahah can go crazy..hopefully not..i believe i won't but no harm saying i might..=p classes as usual..friends are all still friendly..nothing much to write.
I am 20 years old now..but i realized i don't really get the treatment of an adult from my parents..blessed lucky or the other way round? i con't know..came back late yesterday..parents were not happy because i was driving..gave me angry looks and 2 LONG SENTENCES from each of them..i understand their concern and worries for me..but..but.. i still feel rebellious angry....i dunno..aarrggghhh!!! My problem..? i always reasoned with myself..supress myself and always think and analyse things from both side of the matter..therefore i know i can't just make a mistake or just let go some things just like that! Confusing..? I am..or not..*sigh* but I still love my parents a lot..=)
PY had fun at Singapore..me so jealous..i want to go also..meeting new people..hearing new stories, learning and gaining new experiences from these people she met..people who won't judge or care..i so understand how she feels..and so want to experience it..when i said 'people' i don't meant those Singaporeans..=p i meant those backpackers she met and share the same dorm, toilet and bathrooms with..different kind of people from different countries all gathered at the Inn..good for her..but PY..next time don't 'run away' ooo!! hehe but then if it's for me..i might 'run' too! =p but like i said again...not a bad experience..hahahah jealous gila here! babe..IF my plan to visit England again next summer NOT working out...I am soooooo going to Singapore or Bangkok with you gals yah!!! i sooo want to go travel..sooo desperate to travel..x) but of course must JAGA BUDGET.. =p
hmmmmm let's see..current obsession..a Korean actor we saw recently on tv..Lee Dong Wook shii or Wookie!! heheh he is not the super cutie type and some might say he is not handsome at all..but i like him...his eyes and his smile... hihihihih xp love him!! and his on/off screen chemistry with Ms Lee Da Hae is so cute..hehehe hopefully real life they really did get together...i don't mind at all xp well i went online to look for his pictures..found a lot..but sad thing happened..went to some sites which is in Chinese language..TAK FAHAM even one word!!! so sad..i must learn chinese...MUST MUST MUST!!!! *sigh* those pictures made me happy though...=p
Now..Sunday afternoon..Suzuka GP..Massa pole Michael Schumacher 2nd..Renault 3rd row..everything looked so good..chances high..race started..1st pit-stop done..Michael leading..Alonso 2nd..everything looked damn good..but still i kept my fingers crossed.........................................2nd pit-stop..Alonso went in earlier than Michael..came out still behind Michael..THEN Michael went in...came out IN FRONT OF ALONSO.....everything looked good still..............I went back to my papers in front of me............ AND ALL OF A SUDDEN...ALL OF A SUDDEN MICHAEL'S CAR WAS SMOKING...HIS V8 ENGINE FAILED HIM!!!!!!! CAN ANYONE BELIEVE THAT!!!! 17 LAPS TO GO!!!! 17 LAPS!!!!! TO HIS 2 POINTS EXTRA OF ALONSO....HOW CAN THIS BE????? AAAHHHH..... I HATE TO SEE THE LOOK ON BRIATORE'S FACE WHEN ALONSO PAST MICHAEL THERE ON THE TRACK...NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO......!!!!!!! almost all the fans were not happy...full house but i know they came to see Michael for the last time and to support their Toyota and Honda......i hate it...i am so ANGRY...i don't want Michael to lose to the cry baby Alonso!!!!! nnooooooo!!! left another race to go...how to win...how to win? unless ofcourse..we pray hard alonso's car spin out of track at Brasil!!...hopefully...but sooo bad...i don't care...*sob sob sob boo hoo hoo* =( damn sad...going to look at Wookie shi again...*sigh* thank God Kimi is going to Ferrari next year...ahahaha..he is soooo mine next year!! Alonso beware...KImi is the next world champion!!! =p
Here goes..Haze haze go away..i hate it so much..it is not a natural phenomenon..we are not supposed to experience it every year unless the land at Indonesia self-combust every year and all then i can't complain much..but this time again it was caused by IDIOTS..NO-BRAINER..HOMO SAPIEN..do they realized how many countries is affected by it? Use the brain la please..Almost every moning i saw ambulance rushing here and there..pity those people with asthma and breathing difficulties..God bless them..poor thing..Stupid haze make me sorethroat..my eyes itchy..and i can't see the KL Tower and KLCC and the moon clearly!! Even driving to and fro uni is so depressing (quote amelia) i am driving tomorrow..hopefully the haze will be gone just like yesterday.
it's been 5 weeks since i last blog..too many things to think of and do..busy busy busy..ahahah now new assignment..4000words!!! Econs..ahahahah can go crazy..hopefully not..i believe i won't but no harm saying i might..=p classes as usual..friends are all still friendly..nothing much to write.
I am 20 years old now..but i realized i don't really get the treatment of an adult from my parents..blessed lucky or the other way round? i con't know..came back late yesterday..parents were not happy because i was driving..gave me angry looks and 2 LONG SENTENCES from each of them..i understand their concern and worries for me..but..but.. i still feel rebellious angry....i dunno..aarrggghhh!!! My problem..? i always reasoned with myself..supress myself and always think and analyse things from both side of the matter..therefore i know i can't just make a mistake or just let go some things just like that! Confusing..? I am..or not..*sigh* but I still love my parents a lot..=)
PY had fun at Singapore..me so jealous..i want to go also..meeting new people..hearing new stories, learning and gaining new experiences from these people she met..people who won't judge or care..i so understand how she feels..and so want to experience it..when i said 'people' i don't meant those Singaporeans..=p i meant those backpackers she met and share the same dorm, toilet and bathrooms with..different kind of people from different countries all gathered at the Inn..good for her..but PY..next time don't 'run away' ooo!! hehe but then if it's for me..i might 'run' too! =p but like i said again...not a bad experience..hahahah jealous gila here! babe..IF my plan to visit England again next summer NOT working out...I am soooooo going to Singapore or Bangkok with you gals yah!!! i sooo want to go travel..sooo desperate to travel..x) but of course must JAGA BUDGET.. =p
hmmmmm let's see..current obsession..a Korean actor we saw recently on tv..Lee Dong Wook shii or Wookie!! heheh he is not the super cutie type and some might say he is not handsome at all..but i like him...his eyes and his smile... hihihihih xp love him!! and his on/off screen chemistry with Ms Lee Da Hae is so cute..hehehe hopefully real life they really did get together...i don't mind at all xp well i went online to look for his pictures..found a lot..but sad thing happened..went to some sites which is in Chinese language..TAK FAHAM even one word!!! so sad..i must learn chinese...MUST MUST MUST!!!! *sigh* those pictures made me happy though...=p
Now..Sunday afternoon..Suzuka GP..Massa pole Michael Schumacher 2nd..Renault 3rd row..everything looked so good..chances high..race started..1st pit-stop done..Michael leading..Alonso 2nd..everything looked damn good..but still i kept my fingers crossed.........................................2nd pit-stop..Alonso went in earlier than Michael..came out still behind Michael..THEN Michael went in...came out IN FRONT OF ALONSO.....everything looked good still..............I went back to my papers in front of me............ AND ALL OF A SUDDEN...ALL OF A SUDDEN MICHAEL'S CAR WAS SMOKING...HIS V8 ENGINE FAILED HIM!!!!!!! CAN ANYONE BELIEVE THAT!!!! 17 LAPS TO GO!!!! 17 LAPS!!!!! TO HIS 2 POINTS EXTRA OF ALONSO....HOW CAN THIS BE????? AAAHHHH..... I HATE TO SEE THE LOOK ON BRIATORE'S FACE WHEN ALONSO PAST MICHAEL THERE ON THE TRACK...NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO......!!!!!!! almost all the fans were not happy...full house but i know they came to see Michael for the last time and to support their Toyota and Honda......i hate it...i am so ANGRY...i don't want Michael to lose to the cry baby Alonso!!!!! nnooooooo!!! left another race to go...how to win...how to win? unless ofcourse..we pray hard alonso's car spin out of track at Brasil!!...hopefully...but sooo bad...i don't care...*sob sob sob boo hoo hoo* =( damn sad...going to look at Wookie shi again...*sigh* thank God Kimi is going to Ferrari next year...ahahaha..he is soooo mine next year!! Alonso beware...KImi is the next world champion!!! =p
Thursday, September 14, 2006
uni life
Ahhh...i hate it so much when i lost the thing that i type..i was about to finish the whole entry and ready to post..suddenly the lightning strike and poof!Everything gone!! Luckily my notebook is safe and sound.. =p
so here is my 2nd try ..finally after another week only I have the mood to start blogging..it's thursday..im suppose to be doing my tutorial work which will eventually help me in my assignment but i just can't seem to finish it..all the question is about myself..I realized now i don't really understand myself very well..hehe good tutorial huh?..i'm starting to question myself and make an effort to know who i am..what i am like..i kinda like this tutorial now..=) im enjoying while i can..i can imagine all those assignments im bound to face later..argghh!
Well let's talk about last week..my 1st week of uni..1st day as usual is orientation day..get to know who and who's in the Department of Econs..who we should go to if we need help..rules and regulation of Help University College and my UEL programme..before this i was quite excited and nervous about starting uni..all i knew was im going there alone..i've prepared myself, tell myself to be friendly(which i am always =p)..get to know new friends and all..it's a new beginning and all those very motivational stuff..heheh =) but im a lucky gal as usual..i met my f6 school-mate there and we live nearby each other..we ended up car-pooling and there settled my petrol and parking fee(not so expensive now)...hahahha =) moreover my friend came along with her friend who has a GROUP of friends and i ended up knowing a lot of people in the 1st week time..not bad i'll say =) i even get to know some friends from Sabah..they are very nice and friendly too..everything settled in nicely..so anticlimax..heheh i was expecting some challeging things to happen but then again im always a lucky gal which i don't mind at all =p
My course..how is it?Well I kinda enjoy Econs..interesting..something like science..cause and effect..and all those graph..theories..but im only having it for the 1st semester..then comes FE1019..hehe Academic Skills for Accounting..i like the lecturer a lot..a funny guy and he knows how to conduct a class and make it interesting which i am thankful of..hehe that's because my Cost and Managerial Accounting 's lecturer is boring but it is one of the core subjects..have to live with it but i do believe she is good..=) then again we can't just depend on her alone..i have to study myself..talking about studying..at first i was worried that i can't catch up with the others who have basic in accounting..but then after 2weeks i realized as long as i work hard then it should not be a problem..thank God again for my command of English heheh..im very religious today =p it helps a lot when the subjects im taking is all in English..i feel much better now..im very happy..bye bye to the rotting-at-home Shwu Chenn! =)
Another thing..in school everyone know me as Shwu Chenn and not my English name..some of them don't even know i have an english name ever since i was age3/4/5 and if they know they'll think im related with the guinea pig species because of the pronounciation..but at uni i suddenly feel like it's ok for everyone to call me by my english name Ginny...i won't feel like im out of place..awkward like it is not me..now when i realized some people can't pronounce my name Shwu properly i straight away ask them to call me Ginny heheh..kinda fun also cause i don't like the way they pronounce my Shwu wrongly!! It is supposed to be SHOE and if better SCHU(as in michael schumacher's schu...heheheh =p) and not SWEEEEE...sound like SWEE lan..SWEE may or whatever...no offence to those named swee lan/may but it's not me it's not my name so i don't like it!! =p so to everybody my name is LIEW SHWU CHENN..you can also call me GINNY and im not related to any rodent species 'k.. =)
Well i better sign out now..i need to finish my tutorial and do some reading..hehe sound sooo not like me right? Don't worry..Chenn Chenn is still here..she has just become very motivated and hardworking only..because her parents have to PAY A LOT to get her into uni!! =p I can't have them dissapointed at me.. =) hopefully i can get PTPTN full loan.. *pray pray*
so here is my 2nd try ..finally after another week only I have the mood to start blogging..it's thursday..im suppose to be doing my tutorial work which will eventually help me in my assignment but i just can't seem to finish it..all the question is about myself..I realized now i don't really understand myself very well..hehe good tutorial huh?..i'm starting to question myself and make an effort to know who i am..what i am like..i kinda like this tutorial now..=) im enjoying while i can..i can imagine all those assignments im bound to face later..argghh!
Well let's talk about last week..my 1st week of uni..1st day as usual is orientation day..get to know who and who's in the Department of Econs..who we should go to if we need help..rules and regulation of Help University College and my UEL programme..before this i was quite excited and nervous about starting uni..all i knew was im going there alone..i've prepared myself, tell myself to be friendly(which i am always =p)..get to know new friends and all..it's a new beginning and all those very motivational stuff..heheh =) but im a lucky gal as usual..i met my f6 school-mate there and we live nearby each other..we ended up car-pooling and there settled my petrol and parking fee(not so expensive now)...hahahha =) moreover my friend came along with her friend who has a GROUP of friends and i ended up knowing a lot of people in the 1st week time..not bad i'll say =) i even get to know some friends from Sabah..they are very nice and friendly too..everything settled in nicely..so anticlimax..heheh i was expecting some challeging things to happen but then again im always a lucky gal which i don't mind at all =p
My course..how is it?Well I kinda enjoy Econs..interesting..something like science..cause and effect..and all those graph..theories..but im only having it for the 1st semester..then comes FE1019..hehe Academic Skills for Accounting..i like the lecturer a lot..a funny guy and he knows how to conduct a class and make it interesting which i am thankful of..hehe that's because my Cost and Managerial Accounting 's lecturer is boring but it is one of the core subjects..have to live with it but i do believe she is good..=) then again we can't just depend on her alone..i have to study myself..talking about studying..at first i was worried that i can't catch up with the others who have basic in accounting..but then after 2weeks i realized as long as i work hard then it should not be a problem..thank God again for my command of English heheh..im very religious today =p it helps a lot when the subjects im taking is all in English..i feel much better now..im very happy..bye bye to the rotting-at-home Shwu Chenn! =)
Another thing..in school everyone know me as Shwu Chenn and not my English name..some of them don't even know i have an english name ever since i was age3/4/5 and if they know they'll think im related with the guinea pig species because of the pronounciation..but at uni i suddenly feel like it's ok for everyone to call me by my english name Ginny...i won't feel like im out of place..awkward like it is not me..now when i realized some people can't pronounce my name Shwu properly i straight away ask them to call me Ginny heheh..kinda fun also cause i don't like the way they pronounce my Shwu wrongly!! It is supposed to be SHOE and if better SCHU(as in michael schumacher's schu...heheheh =p) and not SWEEEEE...sound like SWEE lan..SWEE may or whatever...no offence to those named swee lan/may but it's not me it's not my name so i don't like it!! =p so to everybody my name is LIEW SHWU CHENN..you can also call me GINNY and im not related to any rodent species 'k.. =)
Well i better sign out now..i need to finish my tutorial and do some reading..hehe sound sooo not like me right? Don't worry..Chenn Chenn is still here..she has just become very motivated and hardworking only..because her parents have to PAY A LOT to get her into uni!! =p I can't have them dissapointed at me.. =) hopefully i can get PTPTN full loan.. *pray pray*
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
replying amelia.....
Dear Amelia, do i have to explain all over again how and why i don't step on the brakes? =p you know damn well it's because of the car is auto gear!! I haven't get used with it.. Remember when i drove your Kenari..give me some time baby jie jie..and you can't exactly conclude it with one time experience..that was my first time driving the car la..you should be proud that you were my first friend to get into my car... =p im getting used to it day by day..hehehe actually my mom also complained i don't step on the brakes when i turn.. =p so i promise i'll form a loving relationship between my foot and the brake pedal 'k..i'll be nice xp hopefully the foot listen to my brain though..it has a mind of its own after so long of driving manual gear =) they move by itself to step on the clutch then the brake..but auto car don't have clutch..so the other foot is damn lazy...
muahhahaha i talk like my foot is another living being! omigod! i really need 'help' soon!!
lastly hopefully there will be good news coming from Budget 2007..hopefully the rumours we heard is not true...or else have to headache again..
muahhahaha i talk like my foot is another living being! omigod! i really need 'help' soon!!
lastly hopefully there will be good news coming from Budget 2007..hopefully the rumours we heard is not true...or else have to headache again..
replying amelia.....
Dear Amelia, do i have to explain all over again how and why i don't step on the brakes? =p you know damn well it's because of the car is auto gear!! I haven't get used with it.. Remember when i drove your Kenari..give me some time baby jie jie..and you can't exactly conclude it with one time experience..that was my first time driving the car la..you should be proud that you were my first friend to get into my car... =p im getting used to it day by day..hehehe actually my mom also complained i don't step on the brakes when i turn.. =p so i promise i'll form a loving relationship between my foot and the brake pedal 'k..i'll be nice xp hopefully the foot listen to my brain though..it has a mind of its own after so long of driving manual gear =) they move by itself to step on the clutch then the brake..but auto car don't have clutch..so the other foot is damn lazy...
muahhahaha i talk like my foot is another living being! omigod! i really need 'help' soon!!
lastly hopefully there will be good news coming from Budget 2007..hopefully the rumours we heard is not true...or else have to headache again..
muahhahaha i talk like my foot is another living being! omigod! i really need 'help' soon!!
lastly hopefully there will be good news coming from Budget 2007..hopefully the rumours we heard is not true...or else have to headache again..
Monday, August 28, 2006
car...
Finally my car is here...really weird driving it at first..because it is an auto gear car..im a manual driver...i like my dad's Toyota Unser more..heheh but i think it's the difference between a new car with an old car also..i don't like the brake..but it is supposed to be the most important component right!!!...eventhough it's tougher to drive an old car but im beginning to like it the more i drive it..hhmmm..issit practise makes perfect? no? hehehehe...
i drove the car back from damansara..i was kinda telling my mom i don't really like it especially the brake but later when i was driving around to places and all i realized that i like it now..i just have to get used to it but i promised myself that i am going to pamper myself with a new car in 4 years time..heheh hopefully!! =p anyhow driving a new car feels much much better!! and for now i cannot complain much as long as i have a car to go to class then it will be fine.. =/ hehehe...finally next week is coming!! 4th of september!!
Amelia and i went out for pizza with Edmund, Sharmila:she is so slim!!! Manipal really can do wonders!!, Peter and Michele..miss them so much esspecially Sharmila..we had a great time together eating pizza and talking about the good old days and celebrated ed's birthday..really fun gossiping about our old school mates!! =p wondering what are they doing now...everything turned out nicely except for some hiccups..(my mom =p being impatient) but no big deal..i just ended up practising driving the car more!! =p
i have to go to car's accesories shop to do shopping now...=p want to decoratemy car with some stuff a bit..anyhow it is an old car..trying to make it look nicer!! =p
so far i love the car's aircon.(very very cold!!) and the pick up when i step on the accelerator..better than some old cars i've known..thats about all..i'll find more things to like soon..im sure of it!! =)
i drove the car back from damansara..i was kinda telling my mom i don't really like it especially the brake but later when i was driving around to places and all i realized that i like it now..i just have to get used to it but i promised myself that i am going to pamper myself with a new car in 4 years time..heheh hopefully!! =p anyhow driving a new car feels much much better!! and for now i cannot complain much as long as i have a car to go to class then it will be fine.. =/ hehehe...finally next week is coming!! 4th of september!!
Amelia and i went out for pizza with Edmund, Sharmila:she is so slim!!! Manipal really can do wonders!!, Peter and Michele..miss them so much esspecially Sharmila..we had a great time together eating pizza and talking about the good old days and celebrated ed's birthday..really fun gossiping about our old school mates!! =p wondering what are they doing now...everything turned out nicely except for some hiccups..(my mom =p being impatient) but no big deal..i just ended up practising driving the car more!! =p
i have to go to car's accesories shop to do shopping now...=p want to decoratemy car with some stuff a bit..anyhow it is an old car..trying to make it look nicer!! =p
so far i love the car's aircon.(very very cold!!) and the pick up when i step on the accelerator..better than some old cars i've known..thats about all..i'll find more things to like soon..im sure of it!! =)
Sunday, August 20, 2006
promise
hmmm...our jogging walking plan did not work out. PY slept at 3am how on earth is she able to wake up? three of us ended up having breakfast only at 10am..then went to PY's house to 'lepak' and i get some books from her house...but overall we did have an enjoyable day...they went to do their hair and i went home to call the TMnet guy to activate my Streamyx line..hehehe after a few hours i finally have my Streamyx!! i now officially have broadband!! damn happy!!very happy and i even tried the video call with PY!! fun fun fun!! =) getting addicted now...
that was yesterday...today my parents and i went to used car shopping..we went to a lot of places and all the prices is just too expensive for the type of cars that i have in my mind..moreover we have a budget to stick to...finally we went to this friend of my mother whose brother has a car that is said to be in tip top condition eventhough it is already 14 years old. We get it with a price below RM 10000 so it is good news for us! =) i just need a transport to go for classes so i don't mind if i have a new car or and old car just as long as the car can move and not stall in the middle of the road...that will be good enough now..i can get a new car myself when i graduate...heheh i promised myself this luxury so i must make sure i can do it...i must make sure i am successful and be able to take care of my family and fulfill my every dreams!!! =) for now i must have patience...patience chenn chenn!!!
hmmm...im a lucky child..i have a chance to further my studies..a car to college..a notebook..broadband..air-con room..everything is provided and enough for me..i have not much complain but i know i am not satisfied with what i have now..i want more but i wont ask from my parents..i'll have to get it by myself.. =p work hard!!
sometimes i wonder..what is relationship? no matter it is a bf/gf or friendship..i wonder can they last long distance?i dunno and have no comment for the gf/bf relationship...but for friends yes i believed we can last..but recently somethings really made me think again...and not only that..i also ponder is there much difference between having gal friends and guy friends? both ways have the pro and cons...really headache..different people different way of thinking and talking and different wavelength..amelia like to say that..it's not easy to find people where we can click with at once..*sigh* i dunno is it my PMS talking but im really tired and confuse when every time i think about it..feeling myself so down and so bad because of it...
i better go sleep on it!!!
that was yesterday...today my parents and i went to used car shopping..we went to a lot of places and all the prices is just too expensive for the type of cars that i have in my mind..moreover we have a budget to stick to...finally we went to this friend of my mother whose brother has a car that is said to be in tip top condition eventhough it is already 14 years old. We get it with a price below RM 10000 so it is good news for us! =) i just need a transport to go for classes so i don't mind if i have a new car or and old car just as long as the car can move and not stall in the middle of the road...that will be good enough now..i can get a new car myself when i graduate...heheh i promised myself this luxury so i must make sure i can do it...i must make sure i am successful and be able to take care of my family and fulfill my every dreams!!! =) for now i must have patience...patience chenn chenn!!!
hmmm...im a lucky child..i have a chance to further my studies..a car to college..a notebook..broadband..air-con room..everything is provided and enough for me..i have not much complain but i know i am not satisfied with what i have now..i want more but i wont ask from my parents..i'll have to get it by myself.. =p work hard!!
sometimes i wonder..what is relationship? no matter it is a bf/gf or friendship..i wonder can they last long distance?i dunno and have no comment for the gf/bf relationship...but for friends yes i believed we can last..but recently somethings really made me think again...and not only that..i also ponder is there much difference between having gal friends and guy friends? both ways have the pro and cons...really headache..different people different way of thinking and talking and different wavelength..amelia like to say that..it's not easy to find people where we can click with at once..*sigh* i dunno is it my PMS talking but im really tired and confuse when every time i think about it..feeling myself so down and so bad because of it...
i better go sleep on it!!!
Friday, August 18, 2006
ramble....
6th of october.....6th of october!!! i have to live with a gap between my two tooth for another 2 more months!!! ahhhhh...well it's all my own fault...aih~ but luckily the nurse did not scold or lecture me at all ...hehehe..just have to wait....aih waiting again...looks like i cannot run from it ...i have to wait for almost everything! really test my patience here..
im goinng WALKING tomorrow morning with two of gals..i think we need the walk esspecially two of them..walk and walk..try to relax our minds..breathe in some fresh air to clear of or wash away all of the problems,confusions and hurt away..by walking we can spend time chatting and chatting about whatever we want without worrying about the time..then we can go and have breakfast together-gether just like old times...something that we have not done for so long because of each others commitment..how i miss those days =) better do it before i start to become like them..
i chatted with bear bear this early morning..he gave me the address to the gang's blog..any of them with the word 'baybehh' are the members(now i know what's the baybehh for)..each of them will blog something about their lifes..how is it going with them..i was so happy about it because i can find out about them through the blog now..i wonder do they know that i am blogging now...hehe..should tell them also later..
my holidays are now more useful..everyday i am calling the TMnet technician to activate my Streamyx line..help mom with the housework and chit chat with her..go jogging with dad in the evening..spend some time with my daddy before i have to start busy with uni..and try to get my brother to work his brain to function properly! =p enjoy durians..blogging and find out about the Greek's Gods...i am quite interested in this kind of things..next i am going to find out more about the Ragnarok..no no..not the online game but the Norse mythology..it's more about war and blood spill..it is about the end of the world thingy..that is the overall story i found out for now..going to dig in more soon.. =)
i've been thinking of taking up new languages..i know some of my Chinese educated friends will suggest polishing my Mandarin in writing and reading..i do plan to do that but i also want to learn another language..prepare myself and actually do something to realise my dreams..im thinking whether to learn myself by getting books and tapes OR enrol in part time classes? if i enrol in classes i am worried that i wont have time for it with what i've seen Amelia going through now..she complains there is not enough hours in a day..i think she wants 48hours a day! =p and i have so many languages to choose from..hmmm.. have to think it through properly..(procrastinating again) =p
im hungry..going to eat more of the durians now..and later go jogging! =)
im goinng WALKING tomorrow morning with two of gals..i think we need the walk esspecially two of them..walk and walk..try to relax our minds..breathe in some fresh air to clear of or wash away all of the problems,confusions and hurt away..by walking we can spend time chatting and chatting about whatever we want without worrying about the time..then we can go and have breakfast together-gether just like old times...something that we have not done for so long because of each others commitment..how i miss those days =) better do it before i start to become like them..
i chatted with bear bear this early morning..he gave me the address to the gang's blog..any of them with the word 'baybehh' are the members(now i know what's the baybehh for)..each of them will blog something about their lifes..how is it going with them..i was so happy about it because i can find out about them through the blog now..i wonder do they know that i am blogging now...hehe..should tell them also later..
my holidays are now more useful..everyday i am calling the TMnet technician to activate my Streamyx line..help mom with the housework and chit chat with her..go jogging with dad in the evening..spend some time with my daddy before i have to start busy with uni..and try to get my brother to work his brain to function properly! =p enjoy durians..blogging and find out about the Greek's Gods...i am quite interested in this kind of things..next i am going to find out more about the Ragnarok..no no..not the online game but the Norse mythology..it's more about war and blood spill..it is about the end of the world thingy..that is the overall story i found out for now..going to dig in more soon.. =)
i've been thinking of taking up new languages..i know some of my Chinese educated friends will suggest polishing my Mandarin in writing and reading..i do plan to do that but i also want to learn another language..prepare myself and actually do something to realise my dreams..im thinking whether to learn myself by getting books and tapes OR enrol in part time classes? if i enrol in classes i am worried that i wont have time for it with what i've seen Amelia going through now..she complains there is not enough hours in a day..i think she wants 48hours a day! =p and i have so many languages to choose from..hmmm.. have to think it through properly..(procrastinating again) =p
im hungry..going to eat more of the durians now..and later go jogging! =)
Friday, August 11, 2006
here we go again...
I just cannot believe that i missed my dental appointment....no no no no no no!!!!! How can I missed it? I keep thinking it was either on the 16th or 18th of August and never ever thought it was on the 4TH OF AUGUST!!!!!!!! AAArrrggghh~~~~@!!!! i just cannot believe it...I have to prepare myself for the lectures from the government nurses going to give me...I dare to say they might even scold me 'teruk-teruk' just because I missed my appointment...they are really friendly but they can also get very scary when they are angry...aih..how i dread to call them tomorrow...now i know why there is a gap between my teeth now..because i am late 1 week...*sob sob* =( the downside of going to a government hospital..but i think that is what you get by paying only RM500 for my ortho...of course not all government nurses are scary.. can't blame them also because they have so many patients and appointment to make... =(
MY aunt and her family board the plane this afternoon..I am already beginning to miss them..i wish i can get to go London again...I just want to be there and experience the lifesytle and the different season there..3 weeks at London was just not enough...just like my cousin spending 3weeks here and he was so reluctant to go back to his home country..because it is different..that is what made living in a foreign country so appealing...well that is my opinion ofcourse...i want to experience the different kind of life there..I know the grass there won't be any greener than Malaysia's grass but i still have to give it a try first..I won't be satisfied if i don't give it a try..no harm having an aim..going out overseas to seek more opportunities to improve and to give the family a better standard of living...gain more experience and widen our knowledge...it's a very common aim..everyone want to do just that..even if i could not live there i can at least make sure myself is capable of visiting the European countries and enjoy the beautiful sights and scenery there......i damn envy Yieng Yieng at Australia after reading her latest entry..i want to do exactly what she done there..and i missed her so much..anyway enough of me crapping about my dreams..
2 more weeks to go where some of my friends are going back to their respective countries to continue their studies and for me to begin my degree programme...I am 2semester behind Amelia and Sing Yieng...almost a year and a half behind PY...i hate it ..i don't like it at all but i can do nothing about it and i don't think i will want to do anything about it even if i can...*craps* i just want to get my life starting now..have to get it starting soon!!! Ahhhhhh....!!! i wonder what do i have to do for preparation...all i know is i need money and loads of money and to find a very cheap but reliable car in 2 weeks time ...muahahaha!! =p which i doubt will be possible with my current situation...aih better worry about my braces better =)
MY aunt and her family board the plane this afternoon..I am already beginning to miss them..i wish i can get to go London again...I just want to be there and experience the lifesytle and the different season there..3 weeks at London was just not enough...just like my cousin spending 3weeks here and he was so reluctant to go back to his home country..because it is different..that is what made living in a foreign country so appealing...well that is my opinion ofcourse...i want to experience the different kind of life there..I know the grass there won't be any greener than Malaysia's grass but i still have to give it a try first..I won't be satisfied if i don't give it a try..no harm having an aim..going out overseas to seek more opportunities to improve and to give the family a better standard of living...gain more experience and widen our knowledge...it's a very common aim..everyone want to do just that..even if i could not live there i can at least make sure myself is capable of visiting the European countries and enjoy the beautiful sights and scenery there......i damn envy Yieng Yieng at Australia after reading her latest entry..i want to do exactly what she done there..and i missed her so much..anyway enough of me crapping about my dreams..
2 more weeks to go where some of my friends are going back to their respective countries to continue their studies and for me to begin my degree programme...I am 2semester behind Amelia and Sing Yieng...almost a year and a half behind PY...i hate it ..i don't like it at all but i can do nothing about it and i don't think i will want to do anything about it even if i can...*craps* i just want to get my life starting now..have to get it starting soon!!! Ahhhhhh....!!! i wonder what do i have to do for preparation...all i know is i need money and loads of money and to find a very cheap but reliable car in 2 weeks time ...muahahaha!! =p which i doubt will be possible with my current situation...aih better worry about my braces better =)
here we go again...
I just cannot believe that i missed my dental appointment....no no no no no no!!!!! How can I missed it? I keep thinking it was either on the 16th or 18th of August and never ever thought it was on the 4TH OF AUGUST!!!!!!!! AAArrrggghh~~~~@!!!! i just cannot believe it...I have to prepare myself for the lectures from the government nurses going to give me...I dare to say they might even scold me 'teruk-teruk' just because I missed my appointment...they are really friendly but they can also get very scary when they are angry...aih..how i dread to call them tomorrow...now i know why there is a gap between my teeth now..because i am late 1 week...*sob sob* =( the downside of going to a government hospital..but i think that is what you get by paying only RM500 for my ortho...of course not all government nurses are scary.. can't blame them also because they have so many patients and appointment to make... =(
MY aunt and her family board the plane this afternoon..I am already beginning to miss them..i wish i can get to go London again...I just want to be there and experience the lifesytle and the different season there..3 weeks at London was just not enough...just like my cousin spending 3weeks here and he was so reluctant to go back to his home country..because it is different..that is what made living in a foreign country so appealing...well that is my opinion ofcourse...i want to experience the different kind of life there..I know the grass there won't be any greener than Malaysia's grass but i still have to give it a try first..I won't be satisfied if i don't give it a try..no harm having an aim..going out overseas to seek more opportunities to improve and to give the family a better standard of living...gain more experience and widen our knowledge...it's a very common aim..everyone want to do just that..even if i could not live there i can at least make sure myself is capable of visiting the European countries and enjoy the beautiful sights and scenery there......i damn envy Yieng Yieng at Australia after reading her latest entry..i want to do exactly what she done there..and i missed her so much..anyway enough of me crapping about my dreams..
2 more weeks to go where some of my friends are going back to their respective countries to continue their studies and for me to begin my degree programme...I am 2semester behind Amelia and Sing Yieng...almost a year and a half behind PY...i hate it ..i don't like it at all but i can do nothing about it and i don't think i will want to do anything about it even if i can...*craps* i just want to get my life starting now..have to get it starting soon!!! Ahhhhhh....!!! i wonder what do i have to do for preparation...all i know is i need money and loads of money and to find a very cheap but reliable car in 2 weeks time ...muahahaha!! =p which i doubt will be possible with my current situation...aih better worry about my braces better =)
MY aunt and her family board the plane this afternoon..I am already beginning to miss them..i wish i can get to go London again...I just want to be there and experience the lifesytle and the different season there..3 weeks at London was just not enough...just like my cousin spending 3weeks here and he was so reluctant to go back to his home country..because it is different..that is what made living in a foreign country so appealing...well that is my opinion ofcourse...i want to experience the different kind of life there..I know the grass there won't be any greener than Malaysia's grass but i still have to give it a try first..I won't be satisfied if i don't give it a try..no harm having an aim..going out overseas to seek more opportunities to improve and to give the family a better standard of living...gain more experience and widen our knowledge...it's a very common aim..everyone want to do just that..even if i could not live there i can at least make sure myself is capable of visiting the European countries and enjoy the beautiful sights and scenery there......i damn envy Yieng Yieng at Australia after reading her latest entry..i want to do exactly what she done there..and i missed her so much..anyway enough of me crapping about my dreams..
2 more weeks to go where some of my friends are going back to their respective countries to continue their studies and for me to begin my degree programme...I am 2semester behind Amelia and Sing Yieng...almost a year and a half behind PY...i hate it ..i don't like it at all but i can do nothing about it and i don't think i will want to do anything about it even if i can...*craps* i just want to get my life starting now..have to get it starting soon!!! Ahhhhhh....!!! i wonder what do i have to do for preparation...all i know is i need money and loads of money and to find a very cheap but reliable car in 2 weeks time ...muahahaha!! =p which i doubt will be possible with my current situation...aih better worry about my braces better =)
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
im bored....
Ahhh...tuesday..hehe I just came back from Penang on Sunday..spend three days two nights at Gurney Hotel relaxing enjoying the view from the hotel room...beautiful!! and since we are talking about Penang so the food must not be excluded..I just keep eating and eating ahhhhh~~!! fun fun fun =p
I chatted with my old school friends online...i realized I miss them a lot..im so happy that this thursday we are coming out for a drink! Im going to meet up with friends that i haven't see for almost 3 years..friends that i take for granted where i thought they will always be there.. =) now i missed them so much.. im just so excited about it and lingwei is also joining us...yay! That girl damn 'susah' can ask her out...her schedule damn packed! =p so this thursday is sooo going to be fun!!! =)
I chatted with my old school friends online...i realized I miss them a lot..im so happy that this thursday we are coming out for a drink! Im going to meet up with friends that i haven't see for almost 3 years..friends that i take for granted where i thought they will always be there.. =) now i missed them so much.. im just so excited about it and lingwei is also joining us...yay! That girl damn 'susah' can ask her out...her schedule damn packed! =p so this thursday is sooo going to be fun!!! =)
Monday, July 10, 2006
Craps......
I was late..im supposed to blog yesterday..went to check out the last place in my mind...this time is the very adorable Kenny's turn to drive with Amelia sitting next to him..hehe i felt like im their kid and they were my parents accompanying me..xp Kenny and Amelia..you guys are the best..i never expected both of you to fetched me to the PTPTN bulding..and ended up very 'cha tou' by the Shell HQ building.. =p i apreciated alot what you guys did for me..we did ejoyed the day and Amelia did get a top from MNG =)
so sorry amelia i had to 'fong fei kei' yesterday..mum don't really want me to go out =) but i don't regret..coz get to see the final with the tv a few feet away from me only...! =p
i took the day to think of my options...most probably i'll go for UEL..like what my dear friend said..follow where my heart leads..and my instinct which i believe is rarely wrong =p...of course hopefully i'll get a full loan from PTPTN..that's really important so that i won't burden my parents too much..at least i can pay back the loan myself when i come out working..but if there's no full loan or anything i'll still have my last resort which im reluctant to use..so dear God i hope You hear me from up there..i pray to You =)..well the only thing left to do after applying was to mentally lecture myself about my past mistakes..this is like a second chance for me..cannot blow it off! xp GO GO GO gal*myself*!!
hehe...the World Cup ended..ITALY WON!!! but actually after watching the game i don't really mind which team win..both team played very well..but i just don't understand what the f*** was Master Zizou thinking man??!! what did the italian player said that could have brought out this other side of Mr.Zinedine Zidane? i thought he's supposed to be a player with a class of his own...my dad and i was so shocked to the extend where both of us had our mouth open gagging for so long that if we can see ourselves,we must've looked damn funny!! before Mr.Zidane was sent out,he showed us the beauty of the game..he played so well that i think if without him..the match wouldn't have last till penalty shoot-out..well thats what i thought..but other french player was very good too..Mr.Henry was really a genius in football like what i heard..too bad he can't last longer though..hehe i'll forgive them for kicking out Brazil..the way the french and italian played proved that they soooo deserve to be at final =) instead of the so arrogant-thought-to-be-full-of-hope brazil =p
the italians was very good too..but i thought they were a bit behind at the 2nd half..although i really enjoyed seeing fabio cannavarro defend..he's good..they played with a vengeance..i like that..heheh but they are italians..they'll still look so sexy even if they lose the game..muahahahaha!i just realised yesterday that buffon's eye was so girlie..beautiful i must say..pirlo's hair was like he's doin a 90minutes full of syampoo commercial..damn jealous of him!! totti looked so boyish when he laugh..erm..who else ah..plenty but i just dunno how to spell or pronounce their name..overall they were fun to watch except the part where pirlo hugged fabio from behind looking at the penalty shoot-out..eeeww!! and zharif said that's the sexiest moment of all..urghhh yuck! they are sexy INDIVIDUALLY BUT NOT TOGETHER!!!! =p i talked too much about their sexiness....sound like im obsessed with them hehehe..better stop! =)
but the frenchmen and the italians did gave us a very memorable World Cup final..!! hope to see some of them at 2010!! and those germans too..bastian..lucas..hopefully klose and the rest!! im just soooo greedy..hehehemuahahahahah!!! xp
so sorry amelia i had to 'fong fei kei' yesterday..mum don't really want me to go out =) but i don't regret..coz get to see the final with the tv a few feet away from me only...! =p
i took the day to think of my options...most probably i'll go for UEL..like what my dear friend said..follow where my heart leads..and my instinct which i believe is rarely wrong =p...of course hopefully i'll get a full loan from PTPTN..that's really important so that i won't burden my parents too much..at least i can pay back the loan myself when i come out working..but if there's no full loan or anything i'll still have my last resort which im reluctant to use..so dear God i hope You hear me from up there..i pray to You =)..well the only thing left to do after applying was to mentally lecture myself about my past mistakes..this is like a second chance for me..cannot blow it off! xp GO GO GO gal*myself*!!
hehe...the World Cup ended..ITALY WON!!! but actually after watching the game i don't really mind which team win..both team played very well..but i just don't understand what the f*** was Master Zizou thinking man??!! what did the italian player said that could have brought out this other side of Mr.Zinedine Zidane? i thought he's supposed to be a player with a class of his own...my dad and i was so shocked to the extend where both of us had our mouth open gagging for so long that if we can see ourselves,we must've looked damn funny!! before Mr.Zidane was sent out,he showed us the beauty of the game..he played so well that i think if without him..the match wouldn't have last till penalty shoot-out..well thats what i thought..but other french player was very good too..Mr.Henry was really a genius in football like what i heard..too bad he can't last longer though..hehe i'll forgive them for kicking out Brazil..the way the french and italian played proved that they soooo deserve to be at final =) instead of the so arrogant-thought-to-be-full-of-hope brazil =p
the italians was very good too..but i thought they were a bit behind at the 2nd half..although i really enjoyed seeing fabio cannavarro defend..he's good..they played with a vengeance..i like that..heheh but they are italians..they'll still look so sexy even if they lose the game..muahahahaha!i just realised yesterday that buffon's eye was so girlie..beautiful i must say..pirlo's hair was like he's doin a 90minutes full of syampoo commercial..damn jealous of him!! totti looked so boyish when he laugh..erm..who else ah..plenty but i just dunno how to spell or pronounce their name..overall they were fun to watch except the part where pirlo hugged fabio from behind looking at the penalty shoot-out..eeeww!! and zharif said that's the sexiest moment of all..urghhh yuck! they are sexy INDIVIDUALLY BUT NOT TOGETHER!!!! =p i talked too much about their sexiness....sound like im obsessed with them hehehe..better stop! =)
but the frenchmen and the italians did gave us a very memorable World Cup final..!! hope to see some of them at 2010!! and those germans too..bastian..lucas..hopefully klose and the rest!! im just soooo greedy..hehehemuahahahahah!!! xp
Thursday, July 6, 2006
what's life.....?
2.40am 7th july-- in my entire 20years of being a homo sapien..i never question or bothered with the questions like what is life?..what is the purpose of life? even when some of my friends always ask..i don't really feel the need to look for answer or answer my friends..i just get on with my life ..living it like how i think i should..living it the way it makes me happy..i was alright with this arrangement..until im older..all the decisions about life,future,happiness..decisions involving people you love,affecting people you love..so many things to consider..i hated it but then i know it's 1 of the stages of life that i must go through..i thought i was mature enough to handle some of the decisions..rational enough to face it but then i was wrong...why must it always look easier..said easier than done? i realised learning from experiences and examples is very important..it help a lot but again...it is sooooo not easy to be done..some people can just act on their impulses and decide once and for all..but im not that kind of person..im a Taurus for goodness sake..i don't like risk!! (and yes sometimes i do believe in the zodiac sign thingy..only sometimes whenit's kinda true) i like to make sure of things...i don't like too risky-life altering things..maybe some surprises but not all the time in my life..but i guess im stuck with this things for some time to come..so now my definition of life or purpose of life = it's all decision making..taking up challenges..fittest survive..like animals living in the jungle?i guess..losers get lost and find other habitate..=p *sigh* *crap crap crap*
yesterday thursday was a very busy day...amelia drive me around to do my college hunting..i love her so much for that..have to jam and round for so long just to find parking at the what they call colleges complex..pity amelia also had to walked far with her sandals...so sorry gal but always rest asure that the things you've done for me to day is something that i will never forget..it'll remind me what a true priceless friend you are..really really glad that i have you as my friend...love you so much gal!! =) (not the lesbo way 'k)
well we checked out almost all the uni at PJ..and Subang..prices range from RM40 000++to RM60 000++..if i get a full loan i also won't be able to survive...feeling damn sad when i came home...talk to mom and dad..feeling myself so useless..thank god after the discussion they went off jogging..so i have time for myself and wallow in self pity..crying my eyes out..it's actually a kind of therapy for me cause i feel much better after that..then i started calling friends in universities colleges..asking information and my sweet angel was really nice..we chatted in the phone and he gave me all the info that i wanted..really make my day! at least i know i still have hope..=/ but the info make me think much harder and longer..and i have to take a lot of things into consideration..more headache but it's still hope.. =)
amelia and alex made my thursday busy,bright and hopeful...Jane,an old friend of mind ever since i was young before i enter primary school..known her for more than 10 years..separated when i shifted to kepong and she stayed at subang..our moms are best friends..they keep in touch all this while but i only get news about my dear friend from her mom..both of us busy with our life..making new friends,enjoying school life..and keeping each other's presence in the mind but never take steps or find a way to meet up..i blame it we were just too busy with our lives =p ...but recently when i found out she's going to australia to further her studies..i suddenly felt like i must meet up with her and re-mend or re-connect our long lost and strained friendship...so my family and i went to her house chit-chat for quite some time..i realised we could still chat so friendly like we never got separated before...it's good..really glad to know our friendship is still sailing...=) after she went to australia..i chat with her through MSN..told her how i was doing and she the same..she knew about my case..she helped me a lot..then today as in an hour ago we were chatting and again she helped me in my 'colleges fee and programmes research project' =p really brighten my day eventhough it's still so early and dark in the morning..i have another option to consider now..have to go check it out first though..better be safe than sorry..especially in my case where i couldn't afford to be sorry!!!
i always take a long time to blog...next time must try to type faster...=p hmmm..i should have gone with amy clubbing but later she told me she was just hanging out,chilling at a pub..still a few shots of alcohol should at least help me relax..but then again i have no mood to go out either..=p gtg sleep now or i won't stop crapping...!tata..night night!!
yesterday thursday was a very busy day...amelia drive me around to do my college hunting..i love her so much for that..have to jam and round for so long just to find parking at the what they call colleges complex..pity amelia also had to walked far with her sandals...so sorry gal but always rest asure that the things you've done for me to day is something that i will never forget..it'll remind me what a true priceless friend you are..really really glad that i have you as my friend...love you so much gal!! =) (not the lesbo way 'k)
well we checked out almost all the uni at PJ..and Subang..prices range from RM40 000++to RM60 000++..if i get a full loan i also won't be able to survive...feeling damn sad when i came home...talk to mom and dad..feeling myself so useless..thank god after the discussion they went off jogging..so i have time for myself and wallow in self pity..crying my eyes out..it's actually a kind of therapy for me cause i feel much better after that..then i started calling friends in universities colleges..asking information and my sweet angel was really nice..we chatted in the phone and he gave me all the info that i wanted..really make my day! at least i know i still have hope..=/ but the info make me think much harder and longer..and i have to take a lot of things into consideration..more headache but it's still hope.. =)
amelia and alex made my thursday busy,bright and hopeful...Jane,an old friend of mind ever since i was young before i enter primary school..known her for more than 10 years..separated when i shifted to kepong and she stayed at subang..our moms are best friends..they keep in touch all this while but i only get news about my dear friend from her mom..both of us busy with our life..making new friends,enjoying school life..and keeping each other's presence in the mind but never take steps or find a way to meet up..i blame it we were just too busy with our lives =p ...but recently when i found out she's going to australia to further her studies..i suddenly felt like i must meet up with her and re-mend or re-connect our long lost and strained friendship...so my family and i went to her house chit-chat for quite some time..i realised we could still chat so friendly like we never got separated before...it's good..really glad to know our friendship is still sailing...=) after she went to australia..i chat with her through MSN..told her how i was doing and she the same..she knew about my case..she helped me a lot..then today as in an hour ago we were chatting and again she helped me in my 'colleges fee and programmes research project' =p really brighten my day eventhough it's still so early and dark in the morning..i have another option to consider now..have to go check it out first though..better be safe than sorry..especially in my case where i couldn't afford to be sorry!!!
i always take a long time to blog...next time must try to type faster...=p hmmm..i should have gone with amy clubbing but later she told me she was just hanging out,chilling at a pub..still a few shots of alcohol should at least help me relax..but then again i have no mood to go out either..=p gtg sleep now or i won't stop crapping...!tata..night night!!
Wednesday, July 5, 2006
italy's turn now..
aih..when germany lost to italy ..im supposed to feel very sad because i was supporting germany but the tears just won't come..that means im not as sad as i thought i was..italy does deserved to win the game..it was very obvious they played better football than the germans...aih..i just felt that 1 goal was enough..why 2 goals at the last minutes!!!!!! poor germany have to lose so terribly...aih..well according to my list..after germany will be italy ...hehe so now im supporting italy ..hopefully they'll win the world cup..
my mum was so happy cause she supported italy...been telling me for days italy will win the world cup..no no mum is not a football fan either..she just read the paper where somebody said that according to the 12 zodiac year..this year is the DOG year and when every time a world cup was held during the dog year it was either brazil or italy won the cup...so since brazil was knocked out..it was obvious to my mum that italy will win this year's cup... cute rite..that's my mum's theory for supporting italy.. =p
my aunt called and told me she bought some tops for me from london..she also told me that if she cant book any rooms she might just cancel the plan...aih..please la all those middle eastern tourists..leave some rooms for my aunt can or not!! i want to see my cousins so much! =) esspecially the very naughty Rex =)
checking on my mood...seems fine except for the germany hearbreak..i feel fine...getting back to the normal chenn chenn soon..but this time i have to be someone better..been doing a lot of thinking..must act on what i've decided..can't just talk and no action right.. =)
that's all for today..there's nothing much to write after the germany vs italy game..i don't mind who win in the france vs portugal game..im supporting italy now! =p
my mum was so happy cause she supported italy...been telling me for days italy will win the world cup..no no mum is not a football fan either..she just read the paper where somebody said that according to the 12 zodiac year..this year is the DOG year and when every time a world cup was held during the dog year it was either brazil or italy won the cup...so since brazil was knocked out..it was obvious to my mum that italy will win this year's cup... cute rite..that's my mum's theory for supporting italy.. =p
my aunt called and told me she bought some tops for me from london..she also told me that if she cant book any rooms she might just cancel the plan...aih..please la all those middle eastern tourists..leave some rooms for my aunt can or not!! i want to see my cousins so much! =) esspecially the very naughty Rex =)
checking on my mood...seems fine except for the germany hearbreak..i feel fine...getting back to the normal chenn chenn soon..but this time i have to be someone better..been doing a lot of thinking..must act on what i've decided..can't just talk and no action right.. =)
that's all for today..there's nothing much to write after the germany vs italy game..i don't mind who win in the france vs portugal game..im supporting italy now! =p
Tuesday, July 4, 2006
germany must win!
1.27am- Waiting for the match to begin..have nothing to do so i blog..suppose to wait for my aunt's call from London but really bored so i go online..hehe she won't be able to get through now..sorry 'yee yee'..yes im using dial up STILL that's why..the line is also very slow =(
well nevermind..let's talk about last friday..I went to Sri Hartamas..together with the guys..we reach there almost or after 12 i guess..not really sure ..hehe 1st time went there at night ..and omigod so many damn cars and people there..i mean i know sri hartamas is a happening place but the 'level' of happening on the friday night can still surprised me..i know it's a game night..but still..i really feel like a 'kampung gal' =p we spend half an hour searching for parking..3 cars altogether..and we had to watch the argentines scored their goal from the car..if the car can just stop there we can actually watch the match in the middle of the road..that's because you can find a tv in every corner of the place!!anyway we found parking space then we went to this place to play foosball(not sure bout the spelling)..i took up a place where i can see the match going on when u looked up..8 of us playing foosball...my 1st time playing foosball also..fun!choy and voon bet on the the 2 teams to draw..finally they did draw but in the penalty shoot..i bet with choy that 'my' germany will win!! hehe guess everyone know who win the bet right..!GERMANY ALL THE WAY!
to make myself clear.. im not exactly a dieheart football fan..i just support the team with good looking players or the way the players play..so at the beginning my favourites ARE Brazil(for their samba kick and KAKA!n i personally think Ronaldhino is also kinda cute in a way),England(dun need to explain rite),Germany(ballack,klose,bastian,ehem michael schumacher is german =p),italy(full of sexy mature guys =p),portugal(christiano ronaldo d cry baby)...so as all of you can see..i support them accordingly..that means after my top 2 favourite team lost..next team is germany..so my friends.. please don't question me anymore! =)
back to hartamas..after foosball and the game..we went for a drink while waiting for all the cars to clear off which took about 1hour..we sat there for so long and the road was still full of cars..jie and mun went home first and i had to sit with the rest until half time of the italy vs ukraine match..i reached home at 4am!! tiring but had fun though..my favourite team won..get to spend time with friends who are going off to their respective uni..=)
one more thing...i must whine and moan about....MY BRASIL AND ENGLAND LOST ALREADY!!! i've been mourning since the night..=(
may kheng jie called me on monday..she comes back for 2 weeks..after talking to her and some of my aunties and my parents..im more clear on what i want to do..and im feeling much better that the last few weeks..hate all those feeling insecure thingy..make me feel so weak and helpless
anyway the germany vs italy game is starting..and my aunt is going to call and.... TOTTI almost scored!!! thank god for LEHMANN...erm feels like a live commentator now...gtg !!!! GERMANY ALL THE WAY!! sorry sexy italianos...you guys are still going to be sexy even if you lose...muahahahaha!!=)
p.s. im sitting right in front of the tv now..ahh...love my notebook...muachxx!
well nevermind..let's talk about last friday..I went to Sri Hartamas..together with the guys..we reach there almost or after 12 i guess..not really sure ..hehe 1st time went there at night ..and omigod so many damn cars and people there..i mean i know sri hartamas is a happening place but the 'level' of happening on the friday night can still surprised me..i know it's a game night..but still..i really feel like a 'kampung gal' =p we spend half an hour searching for parking..3 cars altogether..and we had to watch the argentines scored their goal from the car..if the car can just stop there we can actually watch the match in the middle of the road..that's because you can find a tv in every corner of the place!!anyway we found parking space then we went to this place to play foosball(not sure bout the spelling)..i took up a place where i can see the match going on when u looked up..8 of us playing foosball...my 1st time playing foosball also..fun!choy and voon bet on the the 2 teams to draw..finally they did draw but in the penalty shoot..i bet with choy that 'my' germany will win!! hehe guess everyone know who win the bet right..!GERMANY ALL THE WAY!
to make myself clear.. im not exactly a dieheart football fan..i just support the team with good looking players or the way the players play..so at the beginning my favourites ARE Brazil(for their samba kick and KAKA!n i personally think Ronaldhino is also kinda cute in a way),England(dun need to explain rite),Germany(ballack,klose,bastian,ehem michael schumacher is german =p),italy(full of sexy mature guys =p),portugal(christiano ronaldo d cry baby)...so as all of you can see..i support them accordingly..that means after my top 2 favourite team lost..next team is germany..so my friends.. please don't question me anymore! =)
back to hartamas..after foosball and the game..we went for a drink while waiting for all the cars to clear off which took about 1hour..we sat there for so long and the road was still full of cars..jie and mun went home first and i had to sit with the rest until half time of the italy vs ukraine match..i reached home at 4am!! tiring but had fun though..my favourite team won..get to spend time with friends who are going off to their respective uni..=)
one more thing...i must whine and moan about....MY BRASIL AND ENGLAND LOST ALREADY!!! i've been mourning since the night..=(
may kheng jie called me on monday..she comes back for 2 weeks..after talking to her and some of my aunties and my parents..im more clear on what i want to do..and im feeling much better that the last few weeks..hate all those feeling insecure thingy..make me feel so weak and helpless
anyway the germany vs italy game is starting..and my aunt is going to call and.... TOTTI almost scored!!! thank god for LEHMANN...erm feels like a live commentator now...gtg !!!! GERMANY ALL THE WAY!! sorry sexy italianos...you guys are still going to be sexy even if you lose...muahahahaha!!=)
p.s. im sitting right in front of the tv now..ahh...love my notebook...muachxx!
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
feeling numb
28th june, 01.04am- yesterday i came back from genting..showered and straight away went to bed sleep until 9sth...really damn tired because i didn't get enough sleep plus a very hard bed..which im still thinking to call it a bed or not because it's not meant to be a bed!!!
so many things happened since the last time i blog..the reply for uni application came out on the 19th of june..my mind was numb from the moment i read the 2 words TIDAK BERJAYA..well it's not that i'm thinking so highly of myself that i was confident i will surely get the course that i applied for..it's the thought that i didn't even successfully get a single non-important course that shocked me..is my result that bad? i know it is not good enough to compete with other people but i stil harbour some hope that i can at least get a place in any uni in whatever rural area i can think of..i actually prepared myself to go somewhere faraway from home..i really don't mind because at least it's a local uni which will cost cheaper so i won't burden my father too much..but then i cannot blame anyone except myself..why didn't i do better?have i not put enough effort?am i overly confident til i hope too much therefore when the result came out i was so disappointed?..i question myself ever since then..making up all excuses for myself too..i hated myself last week.. i really don't feel like seeing anyone..any of my friends knowing almost all of them get a place..i felt ashamed..i really do.. i never felt like a loser before but last week i really did..when im with them i find myself on the verge of tears not once but many times,thank god i managed to hold myself back..but the feelings sucks! maybe it's because all this while i've done well..the 'kiasu' character coming all out now..im a sore loser ya i know..but i also think with this kind of character,it will help me improve myself more..im not goin to change..i just have to get over the feelings..
I never regret deciding on going outings with my friends..for i know i won't get to spend much time with them and i'll regret it if i didn't see them before they went off to their uni.. i even get to spend some time with friends that i rarely see..it felt good..a bit of comfort there.. =) catch a movie with some of them,a cup of tea and a few football matches which can really help me forget some of my feelings..now i know and understand why some people can't live without football and why some of them even think football is a religion..it's a miracle actually..hehe =p also i owed it to my baby jie jie for cheering me up and calling at the right moment and made me cry..i feel much better after crying it out..to think of it ..i was feeling numb all this while i never actually be really sad or cry about it and now is the best time to do so..cause i think if i don't my head will explode..and this proved that 1 of my future-doctor-friend is correct..the cause of my headache is stress!
hehe at least something happy did happened since last week.. i decided to get a notebook..give a call to Dell and after a few days..my notebook arrived..the first in my life.. i love it i don't care what kenny said but i now offially own a notebook!! me happy!=) because i bought it with my own sweat and blood money!i don't need to trouble my dad eventhough i know he'll still get me 1 no matter i have my money or not..he just loves me so much..which also cause me to feel damn guilty..sorry daddy mummy..i'll do better to improve myself..i remember my promise not to disappoint both of you..me love daddy and mummy!!
im actually blogging now using my notebook..typing on the so ever comfortable keypad...yes i like the keypad very much!=) well looks like i better talk bout my 2days 1 night trip to genting with a group of my friends..they were planning to get drunk there..which they did!8 of us..we checked in to First World hotel about 3.30pm..settled down and everything we went rock climbing or to be precise THEY went rock climbing and i went shopping..i have no interest for rock climbing..maybe will try it in the distant future just not now..but all of us did enjoyed ourselves..i enjoyed watching them climb =p while eating Baskin Robbins!hehe..later when they finish we went to kenny roger's for dinner..i hate genting's kenny roger's..the garden pasta tasted bitter!!!! =( i have to eat choy's share because i told him it was nice..and he oredered it!!so it's kinda like my fault he didn't get to enjoy his dinner..so i took his share..anyway after chewing it a little longer it actually taste good so hehe not much a problem there.!=p later went back to our rooms..the gals 1 room and the guys 1 room..the gals showered and chit chat..went to checked on the boys and all of them's asleep except herng..he was clicking away on his notebook..thats what i heard from voon's gf-siew fern(i dunno how to spell her name)..i enjoyed chatting with her..she's very friendly and crazy..truly fun to be with..we chatted for quite some time together wif jie's gf seok mun..sharing each others drunken experience..=p and mine's the worse! anyway later on we went to wake them all up ..they showered and we went to coffee bean for coffee..and we even managed to catch the brazil vs ghana match! yay yay brazil won!...hehe DUH!=p
Next came the big event..2 bottle of those dunno what kinda alcohol i forgot the name but we only finished 1 bottle..all i know is it tasted like erm..direct translation=cockroach water! i only drink 1 glass mix with coke..and for the rest of the night we gals are the nanny..the guys all got themselves drunk!!and the funniest was voon cause he can't stop talking..he reminded me of my grandfather!siew fern was very happy to see him drunk because she never seen him drunk before..good for her since she's going to sabah..the rest all either vomitted or couldn't walk in a straight line..we only managed to nap at 4 or 5 am..damn tired!and i couldn't sleep well because of the stupid bed!!..the next day was spend in the room sleeping until the last hour before checking out..then went to ulu yam for 'lor mee'..we eat while watching chinese vampire movie!! Nice!!=)
well amelia was right...i feel much better after i blog..=) today is a new day..im going to get myself back to my normal mood no matter what happen..!!=) and i'll follow yieng yieng's advice to laugh and smile more!!!im going to explore and welcome this new stage of my life with open arms!! GO GO GO!!=p
gtg sleep now...it's 3am and i promised mom to go jogging with her later...ahhhhh!!=( tata
so many things happened since the last time i blog..the reply for uni application came out on the 19th of june..my mind was numb from the moment i read the 2 words TIDAK BERJAYA..well it's not that i'm thinking so highly of myself that i was confident i will surely get the course that i applied for..it's the thought that i didn't even successfully get a single non-important course that shocked me..is my result that bad? i know it is not good enough to compete with other people but i stil harbour some hope that i can at least get a place in any uni in whatever rural area i can think of..i actually prepared myself to go somewhere faraway from home..i really don't mind because at least it's a local uni which will cost cheaper so i won't burden my father too much..but then i cannot blame anyone except myself..why didn't i do better?have i not put enough effort?am i overly confident til i hope too much therefore when the result came out i was so disappointed?..i question myself ever since then..making up all excuses for myself too..i hated myself last week.. i really don't feel like seeing anyone..any of my friends knowing almost all of them get a place..i felt ashamed..i really do.. i never felt like a loser before but last week i really did..when im with them i find myself on the verge of tears not once but many times,thank god i managed to hold myself back..but the feelings sucks! maybe it's because all this while i've done well..the 'kiasu' character coming all out now..im a sore loser ya i know..but i also think with this kind of character,it will help me improve myself more..im not goin to change..i just have to get over the feelings..
I never regret deciding on going outings with my friends..for i know i won't get to spend much time with them and i'll regret it if i didn't see them before they went off to their uni.. i even get to spend some time with friends that i rarely see..it felt good..a bit of comfort there.. =) catch a movie with some of them,a cup of tea and a few football matches which can really help me forget some of my feelings..now i know and understand why some people can't live without football and why some of them even think football is a religion..it's a miracle actually..hehe =p also i owed it to my baby jie jie for cheering me up and calling at the right moment and made me cry..i feel much better after crying it out..to think of it ..i was feeling numb all this while i never actually be really sad or cry about it and now is the best time to do so..cause i think if i don't my head will explode..and this proved that 1 of my future-doctor-friend is correct..the cause of my headache is stress!
hehe at least something happy did happened since last week.. i decided to get a notebook..give a call to Dell and after a few days..my notebook arrived..the first in my life.. i love it i don't care what kenny said but i now offially own a notebook!! me happy!=) because i bought it with my own sweat and blood money!i don't need to trouble my dad eventhough i know he'll still get me 1 no matter i have my money or not..he just loves me so much..which also cause me to feel damn guilty..sorry daddy mummy..i'll do better to improve myself..i remember my promise not to disappoint both of you..me love daddy and mummy!!
im actually blogging now using my notebook..typing on the so ever comfortable keypad...yes i like the keypad very much!=) well looks like i better talk bout my 2days 1 night trip to genting with a group of my friends..they were planning to get drunk there..which they did!8 of us..we checked in to First World hotel about 3.30pm..settled down and everything we went rock climbing or to be precise THEY went rock climbing and i went shopping..i have no interest for rock climbing..maybe will try it in the distant future just not now..but all of us did enjoyed ourselves..i enjoyed watching them climb =p while eating Baskin Robbins!hehe..later when they finish we went to kenny roger's for dinner..i hate genting's kenny roger's..the garden pasta tasted bitter!!!! =( i have to eat choy's share because i told him it was nice..and he oredered it!!so it's kinda like my fault he didn't get to enjoy his dinner..so i took his share..anyway after chewing it a little longer it actually taste good so hehe not much a problem there.!=p later went back to our rooms..the gals 1 room and the guys 1 room..the gals showered and chit chat..went to checked on the boys and all of them's asleep except herng..he was clicking away on his notebook..thats what i heard from voon's gf-siew fern(i dunno how to spell her name)..i enjoyed chatting with her..she's very friendly and crazy..truly fun to be with..we chatted for quite some time together wif jie's gf seok mun..sharing each others drunken experience..=p and mine's the worse! anyway later on we went to wake them all up ..they showered and we went to coffee bean for coffee..and we even managed to catch the brazil vs ghana match! yay yay brazil won!...hehe DUH!=p
Next came the big event..2 bottle of those dunno what kinda alcohol i forgot the name but we only finished 1 bottle..all i know is it tasted like erm..direct translation=cockroach water! i only drink 1 glass mix with coke..and for the rest of the night we gals are the nanny..the guys all got themselves drunk!!and the funniest was voon cause he can't stop talking..he reminded me of my grandfather!siew fern was very happy to see him drunk because she never seen him drunk before..good for her since she's going to sabah..the rest all either vomitted or couldn't walk in a straight line..we only managed to nap at 4 or 5 am..damn tired!and i couldn't sleep well because of the stupid bed!!..the next day was spend in the room sleeping until the last hour before checking out..then went to ulu yam for 'lor mee'..we eat while watching chinese vampire movie!! Nice!!=)
well amelia was right...i feel much better after i blog..=) today is a new day..im going to get myself back to my normal mood no matter what happen..!!=) and i'll follow yieng yieng's advice to laugh and smile more!!!im going to explore and welcome this new stage of my life with open arms!! GO GO GO!!=p
gtg sleep now...it's 3am and i promised mom to go jogging with her later...ahhhhh!!=( tata
Sunday, June 11, 2006
race day
12th of june-monday...boring day ..even though it's only 1pm..
i'll talk bout yesterday...1st thing in my mind right after i woke up was to get an IDD card..promised to call yieng yieng so i must keep my promise..called her,talked to her and found out how her friends try to scared her with cats..they blindfolded her and dumped her at a place with 7 or 8 cats there!! poor gal but i think she had fun from the way she told me..good for her!!
the rest of the day spent on sleeping and eating again.it only get more exciting when the british GP started..alonso on pole followed by kimi and then michael..the 3 most important man in F1 now..well for me that is..i only ever read and care about these 3 men..and i only wanna watch 3 of them compete with each other..but alonso's renault was to stable and fast..ferrari and mclaren can do nothing ..just trailing behind him..but michael managed to overtake kimi and up to 2nd place.The only man who is clearly happy was alonso..during the trip from the car up to the podium it was so obvious that michael wasn't happy at all..even kimi couldn't smile.they only managed a few small smile for the camera later on the podium..sigh~ my only hope now is not to let alonso win the championship so easily..but kimi and michael can't do anything because they don't have a faster or a better car to compete with renault..we'll just have to see 2 more races and i think we'll find out then.hopefully my wish comes true..i don't wan to see that renault boss with his tinted shade smiling smugly every time alonso wins!!!=(
i'll talk bout yesterday...1st thing in my mind right after i woke up was to get an IDD card..promised to call yieng yieng so i must keep my promise..called her,talked to her and found out how her friends try to scared her with cats..they blindfolded her and dumped her at a place with 7 or 8 cats there!! poor gal but i think she had fun from the way she told me..good for her!!
the rest of the day spent on sleeping and eating again.it only get more exciting when the british GP started..alonso on pole followed by kimi and then michael..the 3 most important man in F1 now..well for me that is..i only ever read and care about these 3 men..and i only wanna watch 3 of them compete with each other..but alonso's renault was to stable and fast..ferrari and mclaren can do nothing ..just trailing behind him..but michael managed to overtake kimi and up to 2nd place.The only man who is clearly happy was alonso..during the trip from the car up to the podium it was so obvious that michael wasn't happy at all..even kimi couldn't smile.they only managed a few small smile for the camera later on the podium..sigh~ my only hope now is not to let alonso win the championship so easily..but kimi and michael can't do anything because they don't have a faster or a better car to compete with renault..we'll just have to see 2 more races and i think we'll find out then.hopefully my wish comes true..i don't wan to see that renault boss with his tinted shade smiling smugly every time alonso wins!!!=(
Saturday, June 10, 2006
1st post here!!
hello hello! My 1st post at friendster..been wanting to create a blog here because it'll be easier for my friends to know about my updates.ahhh it's 1.37am 11th of june 2006..baby yieng yieng's birthday today..HAPPY BIRTHDAY GAL!!she's celebrating in australia..how i missed her!!tonight was my 1st time watching a football match at a mamak stall,i mean seriously watching a match and not the normal "oh goal yay.." then continue chatting kinda match..england vs paraguay 1-0 boring game..
But anyhow this is what i meant as relaxation..no worries no thinking of work and for a few hours no thinking of my uni and the future! i love this kinda feeling..but it's only a short while..eventually i need to get back to life and do all those weighing and thinking about my options and the paths that i must take..and not that i have much options to choose from..it seems easy for some people when i see them doing it but i know it's not..anyhow i trust myself to get through this..it's just the waiting ..i hate waiting i really really hate waiting.Ever since f5..apart from my trip to london all i did was wait...then started f6 i waited again...what am i waiting for?well i guess im waiting for my life to really start..i don't know how therefore the waiting..well i think i won't need to wait too long..=) i just kinda feel like i don't need to pretty soon..
oh..im officially unemployed now..last friday was my last day at work..took so many pictures with my babies and my colleague as a memory...my baby students damn cute..hehe i know i shouldn't have favourite as a teacher but then i just couldn't help it..i took the most pictures with 2 of them..i'll post it up later when i feel like it =p ...i love the way they just smile or sometimes when they were being naughty,very cute and innocent..i really learn a lot from being a teacher esspecially a kindergarten teacher. i learned to have more patience and how important is pre-education. Also i understand how it feels to be a teacher now..im pretty sure i don't want to do that again..=p
..i wanna dye my hair to a darker colour ..going to do that on monday..then can start shopping on wednesday after amelia finish her exam...i wanna watch so many movies..i want a laptop..new bag the old one zip's broken..i wanna eat sleep and EHEM go exercise..been feeling damn fat nowadays..so must go get fit..at least do some walking or jogging if i can,to improve my stamina..must get back to the healthy level..i now do lotsa eating and sleeping...all junk food!!soooooo not healthy!!!=p
well i think that's about all for tonight..feeling sleepy now..erm..my new resolution..try to blog once a day! =) hopefully i'll stick to it because im damn lazy!=p
nite nite ...tata!
But anyhow this is what i meant as relaxation..no worries no thinking of work and for a few hours no thinking of my uni and the future! i love this kinda feeling..but it's only a short while..eventually i need to get back to life and do all those weighing and thinking about my options and the paths that i must take..and not that i have much options to choose from..it seems easy for some people when i see them doing it but i know it's not..anyhow i trust myself to get through this..it's just the waiting ..i hate waiting i really really hate waiting.Ever since f5..apart from my trip to london all i did was wait...then started f6 i waited again...what am i waiting for?well i guess im waiting for my life to really start..i don't know how therefore the waiting..well i think i won't need to wait too long..=) i just kinda feel like i don't need to pretty soon..
oh..im officially unemployed now..last friday was my last day at work..took so many pictures with my babies and my colleague as a memory...my baby students damn cute..hehe i know i shouldn't have favourite as a teacher but then i just couldn't help it..i took the most pictures with 2 of them..i'll post it up later when i feel like it =p ...i love the way they just smile or sometimes when they were being naughty,very cute and innocent..i really learn a lot from being a teacher esspecially a kindergarten teacher. i learned to have more patience and how important is pre-education. Also i understand how it feels to be a teacher now..im pretty sure i don't want to do that again..=p
..i wanna dye my hair to a darker colour ..going to do that on monday..then can start shopping on wednesday after amelia finish her exam...i wanna watch so many movies..i want a laptop..new bag the old one zip's broken..i wanna eat sleep and EHEM go exercise..been feeling damn fat nowadays..so must go get fit..at least do some walking or jogging if i can,to improve my stamina..must get back to the healthy level..i now do lotsa eating and sleeping...all junk food!!soooooo not healthy!!!=p
well i think that's about all for tonight..feeling sleepy now..erm..my new resolution..try to blog once a day! =) hopefully i'll stick to it because im damn lazy!=p
nite nite ...tata!
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